The Teacher Called Adversity

Why do we expect life to be perfect all the time? If there is order, must there not also be disorder? How could we know what is good without experiencing the bad? Without contrast, life would simply be, flat, unremarkable, devoid of meaning.

Disorder, by another name, is adversity. When it intensifies, it becomes chaos. From an early age, we grapple with life’s complexities, often without even realizing it. Yet, our resistance to these complexities can be startling. Life is undeniably hard. Each day draws us closer to our inevitable end. From the moment we are born, exposed, vulnerable, and impossibly fragile, we begin the paradoxical journey of strength through struggle. Still, we often cling to the illusion that life should be easy, and when difficulty strikes, we recoil as if it were a mistake, an aberration.

But what if adversity is not a mistake? What if it’s not here to punish us, but to teach us?

I’ve seen my fair share of hardship. My sister’s death felt like the final blow, the cruelest twist in a life already marked by pain. I won’t sit here and tell you that such losses ever become "better"—they don’t. But what I’ve learned is that pain can be a teacher if we let it. It demands our attention, forces us into stillness, and strips away the illusions we cling to. Some call this transformative process the dark night of the soul.

It is a time of profound doubt, sorrow, and suffering, a period when life feels like it’s unraveling entirely. But here’s the thing: it’s precisely in these moments, when we are stretched to our limits, that an evolutionary shift becomes possible.

Adversity asks us to awaken. It urges us to step out of the story we’ve created about how life should be and into the reality of what is. When we stop resisting, we realize that the very thing we feared might destroy us is the thing that frees us.

Adversity is a relentless yet compassionate teacher. It doesn’t coddle. It doesn’t indulge us. It forces us to confront truths we would rather avoid.

The first step, always, is acceptance. Life is difficult. There’s no escaping that. If we can’t come to terms with the small losses, how will we ever survive the big ones?

And this is where the wisdom of adversity truly lies: it brings us into the present. When life feels unbearable, when the weight of loss or chaos threatens to pull us under, we are forced to become fully alive in the moment. No past. No future. Just this breath. Just this step.

The question is: will we resist the teacher, or will we allow ourselves to be taught? Will we cling to the disorder, or will we let it guide us to awakening?

Adversity and awakening are intertwined, like night and day. One leads to the other, but only if we allow it. And if we listen closely, we’ll find that adversity is not here to break us—it’s here to break us open.

Class update: 

Upcoming Online Group Intensive (all levels):

Upcoming Retreats:

• Thailand : April 16 to 21

• Kannur: March 1 to 6

If you would like to join or want more info on the retreats and/or classes, please email me at [email protected] 

Keep practicing 🙏