Dealing With Difficult People—The Yoga Way

I’ve had my fair share of difficult encounters. Whether it’s a family member, a colleague, or even someone in passing, life sometimes throws people your way who challenge your peace of mind. In some cases, the negativity or unconsciousness feels so thick, it’s hard not to be pulled into it. But what do you do when you can’t avoid these people? How do you keep your centre when you’re confronted by their energy?

It’s something I’ve had to figure out personally. And while yoga has helped me develop more patience and awareness, I’ll be the first to say that it’s not easy. The real test comes when you're in the presence of someone who brings out the worst in you, and this is where the practice begins.

1. Know When to Step Away

Not every situation requires you to stick it out. I’ve learned that some environments are so toxic that the healthiest choice is to remove yourself altogether. Whether it’s a job that drains your spirit or a relationship that constantly weighs you down, leaving can be the ultimate act of self-care.

I’ve had to walk away from situations where I felt my boundaries were constantly being crossed. And yes, it can be difficult, especially when you care or when you’ve invested so much into something. But I’ve also learned the hard way that my well-being is non-negotiable. I’m kind and considerate, but I won’t hesitate to let you know if you’ve crossed a line. Just because I’m a yoga practitioner and teacher doesn’t mean I’m going to back down or be submissive for the sake of keeping the peace.

We always have three choices: surrender, walk away, or stay and suffer. And yes, suffering is a choice too.

2. Shift Your Perspective, Not Your Power

What I’ve found, especially in situations where I can’t remove myself, is that a shift in perspective makes all the difference. The truth is, you can’t control other people’s behaviour. And as much as you might want someone to change or to act differently, the only real change you can make is within yourself.

In these moments, I remind myself that the power lies in how I respond. When someone’s energy is toxic, it’s easy to get pulled into the drama, but I’ve learned that the key is to remain centred in my own awareness. It’s not about winning or losing, it’s about not giving my energy to something that doesn’t deserve it.

This doesn’t mean I avoid confrontation. There are times when speaking up is necessary, but I try to do so from a place of calm, not reaction. Yoga teaches us to stay present, and that’s what I lean into when things get tense.

3. Intensify Your Presence

Here’s something I’ve come to realise: it’s easy to be present when you’re sitting in a quiet room by yourself or walking in nature. But the real challenge comes when you’re face-to-face with someone who tests your limits. It’s in these moments that your awareness needs to be the strongest.

For me, the key is not resisting what arises, even when it’s uncomfortable. Whether it’s frustration, anger, or anxiety, I allow myself to feel it without getting swept away by it. This is the same principle I apply in asana practice—when a posture becomes uncomfortable, you don’t fight it; you breathe through it.

I’ve noticed that when I’m around difficult people, there’s a kind of gravitational pull toward reacting. But instead of resisting, I use the moment to deepen my awareness. I stay with my breath, reminding myself that I am in control of how I experience the moment. And slowly, I’ve found that the pull of their energy weakens, and presence becomes stronger.

4. Use It as a Meditation

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned through yoga is that every difficult moment can be turned into practice. Whether it’s a challenging pose or a challenging person, the approach is the same; stay present and use it as a meditation.

There was a time when I used to get really worked up by difficult people. I’d let their energy take over my mood and my day. But now, I see these moments as opportunities to deepen my practice. When someone’s negativity shows up, I don’t resist it. Instead, I let it become part of my meditation. Just like in yoga, where we don’t control the external circumstances but surrender to the experience, I accept whatever arises in the moment.

This doesn’t mean allowing toxic behaviour or not setting boundaries. It simply means that I don’t allow their energy to disturb my peace. If I react, I become part of the problem. But if I stay rooted, it becomes an opportunity for growth. It’s a process, and I won’t pretend it’s easy, but it’s been transformative.

In these ways, dealing with difficult people has become less about managing them and more about managing myself. It’s not about changing others; it’s about shifting my inner world, strengthening my awareness, and using every challenge as a part of my practice. This is what yoga has taught me—not just on the mat, but in life.

Of course, all of this sounds great in theory… but let’s see how well I keep my cool the next time someone cuts me off on the road!

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Keep practicing 🙏